Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Do I know you?

A teen girl walked up to the desk. "Where's my sister?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know?"
"That's right."
"But she was just here!"
The little lightbulb went off (one of the bulbs they used in those horrid Itty Bitty Book Lights, by the way, only not as powerful). I had helped a girl log into a computer to type a paper just a little while before. "Check the Children's Room," I said authoritatively, gesturing to the Children's Room mere feet away.
"The Children's Room," I said patiently, resisting the temptation to add, "You know, the room 15 feet thataway. The one that has one and a half foot high letters over the entrance that say "Children's Room." But I didn't. She'll be back for printing help, mark my words.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The late lamented Dewey Decimal System

Our library catalog is maybe not the easiest one to master. So I look up a lot of books and movies for people, which is fine. (Except for the Djooguysguts and other miscreants.) And some people just don't like computers and don't want to learn, which if fine, too, unless they want to complain about how stupid computers are, which, even if true, is like getting mad at self-check at grocery stores. Some people even talk about missing the old card catalog, which I miss, too, and can be roped easily into a conversation about the good old days. But I got a different spin on that today when a patron asked for help finding the Jewelry Making section.
"I wish you guys still used the card catalog and the Dewey Decimal system," she opined. We were standing in the 700's by then.
"Um...we still use the Dewey Decimal system."
"No you don't."
I gave her a weak smile and asked if she needed anything else. I was dismissed.

Monday, December 1, 2008

It's Official: I look really stupid to teenage boys

I began suspecting this since I began shaving, back in the early 17th Century. Anyway, two teenage boys whom I had earlier chided for horseplay (or perhaps it was hijinx, I forget) came to the desk with an elaborate story of how I really needed to page their friend over the intercom. It involved confusion and danger, though the specifics are already fading in my mind. I reminded them that the library was relatively small and on only one floor, but they persisted. For some reason, most likely to get them away from me, I relented. I picked up the phone and asked what their friend's name was.
"Jack Meehoff," the sincere-looking lad before me said.
To be fair, it took me at least a twentieth of a second.
"Do I look that stupid?" I asked. I was honestly offended. Not that they'd tried to prank me, but because it was such a pathetic and transparent attempt. I wished I'd been a little faster on the draw. I would have said, "You know, I think I saw him with your friend Heywood Jablome."
Oh well. Next time.