2010 News Wrap-Up

I know, it’s a little early, but I kinda doubt anything as important as these things will happen before the year is out.
Number 3 Most Important Story

Floods in Pakistan Kill 2,000. Unknown number of parking spaces destroyed.
Number 2 Most Important Story

Earthquake in Haiti kills as many as 230,000. Parking nearly impossible in Port-au-Prince.
Number 1 Most Important Story of 2010

On October 1, The woman at deskslave central, who was neither overweight or elderly, was upset. The parking lot was full. She had to park on the street beyond the parking lot. She had to walk ALL THE WAY to the library from there. All that way. A weary arm was extended, indicated the length of the journey. Odysseus, briefly roused from his eternal slumber, felt like an asshole for making such a big deal out of getting back to Ithaca and issued an apology. Sisyphus promised to stop whining. In China, the Communist Party renames "The Long March" to the more accurate and humble "The Short Jaunt."