Santa Hats

In the week or so leading up to Xmas, you generally see a few people coming in wearing a Santa hat. If the person is under the age of eleven or so, it's meant to be fun and funny. If it's on a teen, it's an ironic statement designed to point out the utter vapidity of the whole charade of Christmas but can I still please have a new iPod. Leading up to the blessed day last year, I saw several on men more or less my age, which is to say super old. And that, I think, says, "Hey, aren't I kooky and fun?" It says, "Watch out, world, the party is headed your way!" It also says, "I'm going to say something really inappropriate and icky and quite possibly sexual to the nice young woman behind the counter at the Circ desk." But that's before Christmas. In the weeks following Christmas, I've seen three different men who are past the age of ironic sartorial statements and well into need-to-trim-the-hair-blossoming-out-of-the-ears age wearing them. I'm pretty sure that's just a diagnosable, cry-for-help sort of thing. One guy was just in, his sad Santy hat on even though it was pretty warm out. The had WAS FILTHY. Like he'd let his dog sleep on it. Since Clinton was president. It made me sad, and that usually only happens when parents are being mean to their kids.